So 2012 started, and
that was something I hadn't imagined would happen. Not for me anyway. Being
diagnosed with late stage cancer in September 2011 made 2012 seem like an
impossibility, yet here I am at the end of it. This is my year.
January: My hair has
started to grow back. Just a bit, not enough to ditch the scarves, but it's a
start. My wonderful, beautiful daughter turns 16. We go to the cinema to see
Sherlock Holmes 2 - my first public outing since my diagnosis. A week later I'm in St Thomas's for my operation. All goes well, although the moment when we
discovered that the anaesthetic coverage is patch is a bad one! Still it
means I have the hand held morphine thing which is marvellous! During all this
daughter visits and applies for sixth form schools. She wants to go to the BRIT
School so very badly. It means an audition and an interview and a lot of
written stuff.
February: Lovely
Agent doesn't like final draft of the 17th century story I'd been writing for
years so it's ditched. But I start writing a new 17th century story!
Hospital consultant is pleased with my progress. I have my last two sessions of
chemo. My hair falls out again.
March: CT scan is,
after some deliberation, deemed clear. I join the Royal Festival Hall and start
to socialise! I even see a play at the Young Vic - Bingo with Patrick Stuart. I
go to an exhibition - Getty Images 'Marilyn'.
April: I visit
family in Wales. First time I've seen my mother since August 2011. She cries. I
think the trip is hard for everyone apart from me. I'm fine. I feel fine.
Everyone else worries that I'll do too much too soon and get ill again. I go to
the theatre again - in London. The Ladykillers. I take back my part-time jobs
that the very lovely people kept open for me. It's rather good. I have
Something To Do. I'm still writing. Lots. I'm not sure it's any good though.
May: I go to the
theatre. Really making up for lost time here. Misterman at the National which
is absolutely stunning! I see Hay Fever too, which is great fun. Daughter
starts her GCSEs. I ditch my head scarves. My first writerly outing without the
scarves is to Miriam Halahmy's birthday brunch. I feel vulnerable and scared
but everyone is very nice.
June: Hospital check
up is fine. Next one in three months. Daughter finishes her GCSEs. They've gone
well. See the preview of Spiderman at the O2 with daughter. Fantastic. I go
back to Wales. No one cries. They're used to me now. Daughter leaves school. I
finish the new novel. Well, the first draft.
July: We visit the
BRIT school. Daughter has a confirmed place on the Theatre course. Thank you thank
you thank you! We go to Norfolk. I feel like a normal person. Looking at photos
now my hair is SO short but it felt luxurious at the time! I go to the theatre!
Midsummer Night's Dream at the Open Air Theatre and it doesn't rain! I go to
Wales. I watch TV a lot. It's the Olympics! I get obsessed with Oscar
Pistorius.
August: Daughter and
I have an excellent day at London Zoo where I gaze adoringly at the Okapis.
Should it have an 's'? GCSE results day. She passes them all! Then she goes to
Reading Festival for the day but phones at midnight to say she's staying there
overnight. Nice. You can imagine how pleased! I go to Colin Mulhern's event at Foyles for his new book, Arabesque. Haven't seen him for six years! And see the
lovely NoN from Catnip too.
September: Send new
novel to Lovely Agent. Still not sure about it. See Curious
Incident of the Dog in the Nighttime at a cinema with NT live. Amazing! Go to
Paralympics and see OSCAR! Go to the SCBWI Sara Grant revision masterclass. And
see Timon of Athens at the National. Go to Wales. Come back. Have blood test.
See consultant. Marker is rising but still in normal range.
October: See Damned
by Despair at the National. Only person in the world who likes it. Go for a
tour of Wilton's Music Hall. Wonderful place. SCBWI Miriam Halahmy stuck in the
middle masterclass. Visit a Victorian mortuary during the London Open House weekend.
A story spark is lit. Visit Rotherhithe, Wapping, and the Crossness Pumping
Station. The spark grows. Talk to Lovely Agent about 17th century story. She's
not sure either. I suggest we ditch it because the Victorian idea is So Much
Better. I go to Bob the cat's book signing. Love him! See the Judas Kiss at
Richmond Theatre. Good grief! Have blood test. Marker is now above normal
range. I have a scan. I panic.
November: The scan
is clear. The marker is still too high, but the scan is clear. I start writing
the Victorian novel. I see 55 Days at the Hampstead Theatre. Douglas Henshall
and Mark Gatiss. Perfect. My mother falls and breaks her knee. Is effectively bed
bound. Not so perfect. Especially for my sister. SCBWI conference. Brilliant,
inspiring, fun.
December: Daughter
and I have a day out - shopping, lunch, and The Magistrate at the National -
great fun and the best curtain call ever. Jo Franklin gets tickets to see
Benedict Cumberbatch (and some others) recording Radio 4's Cabin Pressure and
she takes me! Daughter is furious. I am thrilled. Take Cat #1 to the v.e.t.
His ear is cancerous and will have to be removed. So will a couple of teeth.
Operation booked for January 3rd. Mother's knee is mended. I have blood test and see
woman-who-is-not-my-consultant. Marker is still going up. She is pessimistic. I don't like her. But, for now, all is OK as the scan was clear. I see the Hobbit and love it. So much!
So that's it.
Tomorrow I'm off to Wales for Christmas. I'm back on the green tea. I feel
fine. I'm optimistic. The Victorian novel is going extremely well. 2012 has
been a mixed year but overall an excellent one. I'm still here and plan to be so for a very long time. This year has shown me how lovely people are. I'm so
very grateful for the support I've had from friends, family, SCBWIers, and Facebookers. I've been carried along on a tide of good wishes. So thank
you.
I wish everyone a very Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!
